This is not art!
by chibi-excel
Summary: Johan Ladonia fell in love with a young girl named Alexis ten years ago and promised to marry her one day. Johan returns to college and finds a surprise; Alexis is his roommate, and a boy! Now he wants to call everything off, but Alexis refuses. LadxKug
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.**

**Johan=Ladonia**

**Alexis=Kugelmugel**

**This is not art!**

_**Chapter One: Childhood Love**_

* * *

Johan Oxenstierna is twenty and has held onto the ideal of his first crush for ten of those years. A few days after his tenth birthday Johan's fathers brought him to the Swiss Alps. Here he met his future wife. Well, at least he hopes it is his future wife. She was absolutely beautiful, standing with her two fathers, her long braids blowing in the cold wind. Her name was Alexis and she was perfect. They spent the whole month together playing and talking, bonding over their love of arts.

After that month when both returned to their homes Alexis agreed to go to an English college to reunite with Johan in ten years, when she graduated. Today is the start of the new semester, the start of the tenth year since that day. Johan is excited, of course, and doesn't even pay much attention to the dorms as he enters. He has a new roommate this semester, thanks to him and his cousin Peter getting into a fight last year. Hopefully this guy will be ok with a girl always being around.

Grinning to himself, Johan opens the dorm room door, quickly closing it behind him, and sees absolutely nothing. Not because the room is empty though, but because the lights are off.

"Is anyone in here?" Johan asks, a little annoyed at just how incredibly dark his new roommate made it.

"Silence is art!" A small voice exclaims, reminding Johan of Alexis for a minute. He shrugs it off though; he knows a lot of freshmen who are strangely eccentric about their majors. Especially art majors.

"Being able to see where I'm going is better!" Johan huffs.

"Mystery is art."

"Falling on my face isn't though!"

The boy groans a little and Johan hears movement from the bed. It's a feint noise, whoever the boy is must be small or just move very lightly. Soon the room is illuminated and Johan lets out a loud noise of shock. Standing there, is a sloppily dressed boy. He has a nice blue stripped dress shirt, but it is covered with an out of place white vest. His shorts are purple and baggy, and he wears a red beret. It's all so much that Johan has yet to even look at his face.

As soon as he does, though, he regrets it. Staring back at him with apathetic looking violet eyes is someone familiar. An unhappy familiar given their gender.

"…Alexis…?" Johan asks in shock and the boy nods.

"Hello Johan. It has been a while." The boy says and Johan begins reeling.

"No! NO! NO! NO! THIS IS A LIE!" Johan screams, going up to Alexis. "You're a girl and this is all just a disguise so you can…um…"

"Be in a dorm with you?" Alexis offers and Johan nods.

"Yes! That's it!" Johan says and Alexis looks at him annoyed for a minute before taking his hand and placing it on his own chest, showing him its flatness.

"I am a man, I thought you knew that."

"Of course not! Why would I want to marry a boy?"

Alexis shrugs. "Does it matter the gender of the person you marry? I have no problems with going on with your plans you constantly wrote me about. Of course…I don't want children though. Parenting is not an art I wish to do."

"Wha…? We won't do anything I wrote to you about! Ever!" Johan huffs and Alexis tilts his head to the side in confusion.

"Why not? I thought you loved me."

"I loved a girl! Not a boy! You are missing two very important appendages and have an additional one I don't want anywhere around me!"

Alexis frowns a little. "I see…" He mumbles, looking down at the ground for a moment before staring back up at him. "You will get over your aversions. You will fall for me again."

Johan crosses his arms and looks away annoyed. "Yeah, well, don't count on it!"

"Denial on you is annoying." Alexis says before picking up his art supplies. "I'm going out."

"Good! Feel free to get a new roommate!"

"Not a chance."

Johan glares at the leaving boy. "Brat." Once Alexis is gone, Johan throws himself onto his bed in anger. His first love, the person he planned on marrying one day, is actually a boy! He is NOT gay, at all. There's nothing wrong with gay people, obviously since he has two dads, but damnit he likes women. Alexis fooled him. The boy played him all these years, allowing him to think he was a girl.

Now that he thinks about it though, Alexis never technically said or wrote anything to make Johan believe he was a girl. When Johan had brought up marriage, Alexis suggested a place where gay marriage was legal. The time he brought up children, Alexis said he wasn't too keen of the idea. He never called himself Johan's girlfriend or future wife. In fact, looking back on it, Alexis never seemed to fond of the idea. Perhaps he actually isn't. Maybe Alexis wants him gone as well.

After a few hours Johan has settled in and is now typing away on his computer, doing the first homework of his classes before the class actually starts. He has nothing better to do after all, everyone is off busy with someone and he had told them the day before to make sure they were so he could have Alexis all to himself for the day. What a waste that was.

"I'm back." Alexis mumbles, pulling Johan out of his thoughts.

"Oh, welcome back Alexis." Johan says awkwardly as the boy walks in, dripping wet. "…You're…wet…"

Alexis nods, beginning to unbutton his vest. "Yes. It's raining."

Johan looks at him surprised. "What were you doing in the rain?"

"I was painting it."

"Wha-? You could have caught a cold you idiot!" Johan scolds and Alexis shrugs, sliding his vest off before unbuttoning his shirt.

"Rain is beautiful. Rain is art. If I catch a cold for art, it's a small price to pay." Alexis says before he drops his shirt.

Johan turns to yell at him, but quickly comes to a stop at the sight of his past love interest shirtless. Of course Alexis' body is nothing like Johan had expected, since he's a boy. It is still strangely beautiful though, his pale skin dripping with rain water and a slight pink tint to it from the cold. If it weren't for the flat chest, it would be exactly what he'd always imagined.

"You can't tell me you aren't interested in me when you stare like that simply over me being shirtless." Alexis says, staring at Johan.

"I-I'm not staring!" Johan exclaims, going bright red and turning back to his computer. "I am simply mourning the lack of breasts!"

"If I had breasts you would be interested?" Alexis asks, looking at him curiously. "So all I have to do is wear a bra and stuff it with fake boobs?"

"N-no! I want real breasts! Ones that don't fall out when the girl's shirt comes off! A-and even if you somehow managed that, you still have a little something extra I don't want!" Johan says flustered and Alexis looks down at himself.

"I wouldn't call it little…"

"Ugh! You're not helping!" The red head yells before turning in his chair to be face-to-face with Alexis. "Look, I'm not interested, and looking back on your letters I know you weren't exactly ecstatic at the thought of marrying me either! Just drop it and let's move on with our lives!"

Alexis' brows furrow in confusion. "I was not ecstatic? What makes you think that? I've responded to all of your letters, offered places we could be married that would allow it, and told you I could not wait for us to meet. I even came to the school you wanted us to meet at ten years ago and made sure to get the same dorm room as you. How is that not ecstatic?"

Johan stares at the boy in shock. Looks like the boy won't be giving it up easily like he had hoped. "I...I won't marry you."

"Yes you will."

"I'm not into guys!"

Alexis shrugs. "You don't need to be."

"How does that make sense?" Johan fumes.

"I won't have to share your affections with other men." Alexis answers.

"I like women!"

"We can change that."

"No you can't! It's not a changeable trait!" Johan groans.

Alexis leans down and moves closer to Johan's face. "In all these years you have only been attracted to me, you said so. Whether it was when you thought I was a girl or not, you are only into me."

Johan's face goes bright red and he pushes the smaller boy away. "I-I am not! It's different now! I will never be interested in you!"

"I will make you fall in love with me." Alexis says, nodding to himself. "Yes, making you fall in love with me is art."

"It is not and it won't happen!" Johan whines.

"Whining is not art." Alexis points out and Johan groans.

"That's it! I'm transferring colleges!"

"Alright. With my grades we can go anywhere." Alexis says and Johan twitches.

"Who the hell is this 'we'? Damnit, I hate my life!"

* * *

A/N: I don't know if this would be accurate for their personalities...but...meh. First time writing them, so yeah. They need more love. So um...yeah...I hope this is okay. lD


	2. Chapter 2

**Kugelmugel: Alexis... Niko Niko Republic: Kaoru**

**Ladonia: Johan... Hutt River: Noah**

**Wy: Rae ...Norther Cyprus: Xever**

**Seborga:Marcello ...Molossia: Michael**

**This is not art!**

_**Chapter Two: Snapping**_

* * *

It's been a few days since Johan's first love turned out to be a guy, but to him it feels like years. Every day with Alexis seems to drag on. Maybe because of the looks he will give Johan. Those expecting, yet strangely vacant, looks. Today is going to be different though, he's going to be hanging out with his friends and not see Alexis for the first time since they moved in. It will be great.

"I'm not coming back til later tonight." Johan says and Alexis nods, staring at his sketchbook and drawing.

"Ok."

"I might stay at Peter's tonight."

"You don't get along with Peter enough to stay the night." Alexis points out and Johan sighs.

"Ugh…why did I have to tell you everything about me?" He mumbles in distaste.

"Because you love me."

"Stop saying that!"

Alexis closes his eyes. "Hm… 'I love you more than anything in the world. Unlike what other couples do I will never keep anything from you, simply ask and I will tell you. There's nothing I wouldn't give you.' letter two hundred twenty five, April seventh, two thousand and nine."

"AH! Y-YOU MEMORIZED THEM?" Johan screams and Alexis shrugs.

"Not really…" He looks to Johan and hold up the letter. "I just happen to have it right here."

"YOU CARRY THAT AROUND? THAT'S EVEN WORSE!"

"I suppose you're right. Having memorized it would at least have been impressive. This is just ironic." Alexis says and Johan twitches.

"That is not it! You just carry them around with you?" Johan asks and Alexis shrugs.

"They made me feel less lonely." He answers before standing up and gathering his art supplies. "I told Rae I was going to meet her in the art room. Good bye."

Johan looks at him confused. "Wait…lonely…? Her? What? I have so many questions to that statement…"

Alexis stops at the door and looks back at him. "I am not popular, I've never gotten praises on my personality from anyone but you. Rae is someone I met earlier this week on campus, we share a love of art and I suppose you could say she is now my friend. Oh, and if you need me for whatever reason, the art room is in the Walsh building up the hill."

"Oh…um…" Johan frowns a little. "Um…"

"Bye." Alexis calls, leaving.

"Wha-? Ugh...you can't just leave on that note. I never knew Alexis was so weird with people…" Johan sighs, turning and going to meet with his own friends. On his way out he sees dark clouds heading towards the school and decides to grab an umbrella.

He heads to a familiar building, the campus center, and heads to the food court where he knows his friends are waiting. When he arrives there he goes into the small room they have for their club, a micro nation club. Sitting there dispersed between the large table and a pair of couches near a TV are his friends. First there is Peter, his cousin who is a member of Sealand. Then a guy from Hutt river in Australia named Noah, who is seated next to his boyfriend from the now gone micro nation Niko Niko Republic in Japan names Kaoru.

At the couches he notices the American Michael from Molossia playing a video game with Peter's boyfriend Marcello from Seborga. On the other couch watching is a young freshman named Xever from Northern Cyprus and two other people.

"Ah! Johan, hey!" Peter calls, smiling at him. "We have two new members! An old friend of mine named Rae who came here, she is from Wy. Then there's a boy who is related, and actually is part of, Kugelmugel!" He says and Johan pales.

"…No…"

"His name is Alexis!" Peter says and both Alexis and a tan girl with dark brown hair turn on the couch to look at him.

"Hi! I'm Rae!"

Johan twitches a little and waves to her before looking at Alexis.

"I didn't plan this. I wanted to paint. The art room was closed." Alexis says before turning back to look at the game.

"Son of a bitch!" Johan groans. "I wanted a day AWAY from Alexis!"

"Oh, you know each other?" Marcello asks, looking away from the game he just won.

"We're roommates." Johan grumbles.

"I was also his first love until he found out I was male." Alexis adds, walking over to Michael, who is sulking. "Your sulking is art, can I draw you?" He asks and Michael twitches.

"What? Who the hell asks that?" Michael asks annoyed and Alexis raises his hand a little.

"I do. So can I?"

"…Fine…" Michael mumbles and Alexis smiles awkwardly at him before sitting down and drawing.

"Good, he's distracted." Johan says, grabbing Peter and dragging him to the other end of the room. "He can't be in here!"

"Why not? He seems…interesting."

"He's a jerk! He lead me on to believe he was a girl until I finally saw him! I was in love with the female Alexis, I don't want to see the real male version constantly! In our room is enough!" Johan yells and Peter looks at him nervously.

"Um…Johan…you're yelling loud enough for everyone to hear you…" Peter mumbles before they both turn to see Alexis looking up at them from his crouched position next to Michael.

"Ah. I understand, I'll go." Alexis says blankly, getting up and looking at Michael. "Thank you for letting me draw you." He adds before leaving.

"Wait! Alexis!" Rae calls, jumping up to go get him. She quickly returns, glaring at Johan. "He's gone already."

"…Well…he probably went back to the room…or the art room…" Johan offers and Rae looks away from him annoyed.

"Why are boys so STUPID? He came here for the club. Unlike you he doesn't know many people, idiot!" Rae yells and Xever comes up, resting a hand on her shoulder.

"Please calm down, Miss Rae. This is a complicated situation. They need to take care of it." Xever says, looking to Johan. "Since it is storming outside I would assume he is in your dorm room. You should sit here for a while and calm down. Rae, you haven't eaten today, right? Why don't you come with me for lunch." He offers and Rae blushes a little, nodding.

"Alright…I suppose…" She mumbles, leaving with him.

Johan sighs and sits down at the table. "I know it's not fair to take it out on him…but it's really confusing and he keeps swearing he will win me back…I'm not into guys."

"So…he's actually into guys?" Michael asks and Johan nods. "Huh…shouldn't you be okay with that? I mean there are your dads, Noah, Kaoru, Peter, Marcello…you're kind of surrounded."

"I'm not bothered by the fact he's gay…or that he's after me, really…it's just…the beautiful girl I was so in love with turned out to be a guy. That is very disheartening. Now I am faced with that fact everyday as soon as I wake up. It's like I'm living with her killer." Johan says and everyone looks at him awkwardly.

"That's…a dark way of looking at it…" Noah mumbles and Kaoru nods.

" I understand what you are getting at, though. He proved your Alexis wasn't real, but he didn't mean to. Did he really tell you he was not female?" Kaoru asks and Johan sighs.

"Well no…he didn't…but still…"

"You should be nice." Marcello says. "You have to remember he was in love, too. Not only that, but he thought he found someone who could love him for him, only to have that person freak out on him when they found out he was male. That's really got to hurt."

"He never seems hurt." Johan mumbles and Peter frowns.

"Some people aren't good at showing their feelings, Johan. Not everyone's emotions are right in your face like yours."

"Ugh! Fine! Fine! I'll go talk to him!" He groans, getting up and walking out. when he gets outside he opens his umbrella, but quickly closes it when he hears thunder. "Damnit…" Johan mumbles, running to their room. When he gets there he sees it's completely empty, untouched. "A-Alexis…?" He calls out, hoping maybe he is taking a nap. After getting no response, Johan runs out of the room and heads back outside, looking for him.

"Alexis!" Johan calls, running around outside among the rain and thunder. "Damnit Alexis…it's really cold out!"

"Then go back inside." A voice says and Johan looks over to see Alexis sitting on the ledge of a gazebo.

"There you are!" Johan yells, running over to him and covering the drenched boy with his coat. "You aren't even prepared for rain!"

"I was not expecting it, nor was I expecting to be outside." Alexis says, going to shrug the coat off and being stopped by Johan holding the edges in place.

"Look, Alexis…I know I'm not handling this in the best way…" Johan mumbles. "But…neither are you. You can't make someone fall in love with you when they aren't into guys."

Alexis stares at Johan curiously. "When you saw I wasn't in the room you came running after me, even though it is storming…why?"

Johan blushes a little. "I didn't want you to get hurt…a-and don't take that as a sign I still love you!" He adds quickly. "But in spite of that I still worry about you, so don't do something so stupid again!"

Alexis' eyes widen a little. "Johan…"

"I mean it, if you do it again I'm not coming to get you! Well…okay…that's not true…but I will be super pissed!" Johan yells and Alexis shakes his head no.

"That's not it…" Alexis mumbles before cupping Johan's face, making him blush. His blush quickly fades though when Alexis turns his face to see behind him, where there is now lighting.

"Shit! Let's get inside!" Johan says, pulling away from Alexis before grabbing his hand and dragging him back to the dorm room. They both stand there catching their breath as water drips off of them, pooling on the floor at their feet. "I'm really…sorry…Alexis…"

"I will try to...'pull it back' so you are not as uncomfortable." Alexis says and Johan smiles a little.

"Thanks." Johan mumbles and Alexis smiles back.

"Of course."

* * *

A/N: Um...yeah...here's chapter two. So many names to remember lD How nice for Johan that Alexis will pull it back~! (he totally won't pull it back)


	3. Chapter 3

**This is Not Art!**

_**Chapter Three: He's Not Yours!**_

* * *

Over the past month Johan and Alexis have become good friends. They spend their extra time hanging out in the art studio on campus or Johan will show Alexis tricks with the computer in one of the computer labs. Marcello has joked that Johan is falling for Alexis again, which annoys Johan to no end. It doesn't stop him from doing these things though, like today with him and Alexis in the art studio alone again.

"Johan, what do you think?" Alexis asks, holding up a statue of an angel he has been working on. It's a young girl with long wavy hair holding a small fox in her hands. The faces are unfinished, along with the fine details of the clothing and fox's fur, but as always it is impressive.

"Amazing like usual." Johan says, working on his own clay statue for fun. He doesn't take art classes anymore, having taken all the ones he wanted last year, but he still loves it. With Alexis around he can even continue going to the room even without being in a class.

"Oh." Alexis mumbles, more to himself, and sets his statue down. "I told Michael I would go see him today." He says and Johan looks at him confused.

"Michael? When did you start hanging out?" Johan asks and Alexis shrugs.

"Today apparently." He says and hands Johan the key to the room. "I have to go now, so lock up when you're done."

"Wait…you're ditching me for Michael? How in the hell is that fair?" Johan huffs and Alexis stares at him blankly for a minute before turning and heading out.

"You'll live." Alexis says before closing the door behind him.

"Jeez…aren't you supposed to love me…?" Johan mumbles to himself, looking down at his statue. "Shouldn't I come first or something?" He sighs and gets up, putting their stuff away before leaving.

"Oh! Johan! Actually without Alexis?" Marcello asks, coming up to him.

"He's hanging out with Michael." Johan says annoyed and Marcello looks at him confused.

"Right now?" Marcello asks and Johan nods. "Huh…strange…I just saw Michael and he was getting spruced up as if he was going on a date…" He laughs a little. "How weird would it be if Alexis dated Michael? I mean, he has to give up on you after all…"

Johan frowns. "A…Alexis is gonna date Michael? No, no, he said it was just two friends hanging out."

"Alexis seems kind of…naïve. He probably wouldn't realize he was on a date unless someone flat out told him." Marcello says, laughing a little. "I bet if he got kissed by Michael today he would just assume it was an American thing!"

"Oh god you're right!" Johan gasps. "I-I have to go make sure Michael doesn't put the moves on him!"

"…Michael isn't going to actually…" Marcello sighs. "Someone seems jealous."

"No one is jealous!" Johan huffs, heading past him.

"Try not to make a big scene when you find your fiancé with another man, Johan. I know jealousy can make people do crazy things~!" Marcello teases, heading to his and Peter's dorm room.

"I'm not jealous, I'm not going to find them. I'm heading to my dorm…it doesn't matter what they are doing…" Johan says to himself as he goes to his room. Once inside he falls down onto his bed. "It seems quiet without him in here…I should invite someone over…" He mumbles, pulling out his phone and calling Kaoru and Noah.

They turn out to be busy, leaving Johan to his thoughts. He doesn't want Alexis in that way, right? Right. Of course that's right. Alexis is a boy. The only reason any of this is getting to him is that he doesn't want Michael to take advantage of the dense boy, that's all. Maybe he'll text him, but about what? He can't just simply text 'hey, I have a question, a completely platonic question because I'm not jealous, but is Michael trying to kiss you or hit on you? Please text back immediately.' God no, Alexis would read way too much into it.

He sighs to himself, staring at his phone and thinking of different, more subtle ways, of asking. After twenty minutes of possible texts he gives up, tossing his phone towards the door in frustration. Luckily, before it can hit anything hard and shatter, it crashes into Alexis's stomach and falls into his hands.

"Ow…what was that for?" Alexis asks and Johan jumps up from his bed.

"Alexis! Are you okay? Did Michael try anything?" Johan asks, holding the smaller boy's shoulders and staring at him in concern. "He didn't touch you anywhere, did he?"

Alexis stares up at him for a moment before sliding out of his grasp. "Michael did nothing…we simply had something to eat and I drew him. He is a very animated person, so he's an ideal model." He says, sidestepping Johan to go to his own bed. "But even if something had happened…it wouldn't be your business anymore." The boy points out, sitting down on his bed. "You gave up the right to that knowledge when you decided men weren't your type."

Johan looks at him a little annoyed. "I didn't mean it in that way, Alexis! I was worried he had taken advantage of your naivety!"

"Michael is your friend, yet you think he can take advantage of someone? I don't think that is how friendship is supposed to work." Alexis points out, tossing Johan his phone as he returns to his bed across the room.

"I know you are new to this, but friendship is strange Alexis. Yes, I normally trust Michael, but I know when he likes someone he will put the moves on them. I don't really care when he does it to strangers, but you're not a stranger. You've become my best friend and I don't want you taken advantage of." Johan explains and Alexis sighs.

"I know when I'm being hit on. But let me ask you something…" He says, leaning back on his bed and staring at Johan in an almost challenging way. "What would you do if I was interested in Michael?"

"Wh-what?" Johan asks and Alexis nods.

"In fact, I'm pretty sure that I should go with him on an actual date. Unlike some people, he doesn't care about gender." Alexis says pointedly and Johan glares.

"Don't throw that in my face again!"

"I'm not throwing anything in your face."

Johan groans and gets up, beginning to pace. "Sure, I didn't like that you two went off on your own…and yes, I don't like the idea of you dating someone…but that has nothing to do with feelings or anything like that! It's just…just…" He falters, unsure of his own reasoning.

"Are you ever going to understand, Johan? You can be uncomfortable with my gender all you want…but you are in love with me. Or, at the very least, attracted to me." Alexis says. "I think it would make sense for you to give it a try. Sit with me; hold my hand…only simple things."

Johan blushes. "Y-you said…you would back away…"

"I did. Then you went off and said you didn't want me dating others." Alexis points out. "Getting jealous…means you want me. In some way. I can't back away knowing that." He says, holding out his hand. "Now sit with me and hold my hand."

"Wha-? Stop being so damn…!"

"Right?"

"No! Pushy! Stop thinking you know me so damn well!" Johan yells. "I don't want you, I don't want to sit and hold your hand!"

Alexis lowers his hand and stares at him for a moments before getting up. "Fine, I'm going to Michael's." He says, going to the door.

"I-if you're trying to make me jealous, it's not working!" Johan lies and Alexis shrugs.

"I don't care. I simply want to be somewhere I'm wanted." He mumbles, making Johan tense up.

"I-I never said you aren't wanted here. Just that I don't want to…do that…"

Alexis sighs and turns back to him, leaning against the door. "I've waited…I've waited a month. A month of seeing you catch glimpses of me whenever you thought I wasn't looking. A month of making sure not to comment when you grab something from me and have your hand linger…doesn't think I don't notice these things." He says. "And don't think it hasn't driven me insane…"

Johan looks at him surprised. "Alexis…I didn't think…"

"I noticed? Well, I'm not blind. I see everything you do." Alexis says. "I love you." He adds before opening the door again. "I am going to Michael's now."

Johan sighs. "Do you have to…? Couldn't we just…sit in and order from one of the places that deliver here?" He asks and Alexis blushes a little.

"…That sounds like a da-"

"Not a date! Two friends hanging out and eating!" Johan says quickly. "A-and…watching a movie. A nonromantic movie! Like…Sweeny Todd! Yes! You like that movie, right? I'm pretty sure I've heard you singing songs from it to and from the shower in the mornings…so one could only assume…" He notices the surprise on Alexis' face and goes bright red. "N-not that I listen to you when you head to the shower!"

"Johan…" Alexis begins, taking his hand. "I want you to know that I will wait for you to become okay with the idea of us…" He says, looking up at him challengingly. "No matter how long it takes. So don't worry about me dating anyone else, because I won't."

Johan blushes. "I-! I wasn't-!" noticing the look on Alexis's face and realizing no matter what he says Alexis won't believe him. "…Ugh…alright. Do what you want."

Alexis smiles a little. "Thank you."

* * *

A/N: I was gonna make this one long...but I don't think this story has more than around three more chapters left. Anyways, I don't know what Johan means, Sweeny Todd is SUPER ROMANTIC!


	4. Chapter 4

**This is Not Art!**

_**Chapter Four: Slowly Falling**_

* * *

Johan sighs in exhaustion. The other week he decided to watch movies with Alexis. He thought he was safe with choosing non-romantic movies, one of which was Sweeny Todd. Boy was he wrong. Since that day he KNOWS he can hear Alexis, under his breath, singing 'I feel you Johanna' with a little amendment to the name. So now, not only does he have to deal with Alexis' love but now he has to put up with the boy singing a stalker song to him.

"You look annoyed again, Johan." Alexis observes from his bed on the other side of the room. "You need to take it easy, stress is bad in school."

Johan glares at the typical blank-expression on Alexis' face. "Sometimes I wonder if there's anything he's passionate about aside from art…" He mumbles to himself and Alexis looks over to him.

"You're talking to yourself out loud again, Johan. It's creepy."

"No creepier than you singing stalker songs about me."

Alexis looks at him confused. "Huh? I don't sing about you."

"Yes you do! I hear you mumbling 'I feel you Johan' to yourself ALL THE TIME!" Johan huffs, his face bright red.

"No…I sing the actual song." Alexis says, getting up. "You must just be hearing what you want." He looks at Johan. "If you would like me to sing that from now on, I will be happy to oblige."

"I-I don't!" Johan huffs and Alexis nods.

"Alright, I have to go tutor a boy from my math class now, so I will see you later." Alexis says, heading out of the room.

Johan sits there, wondering if he had actually been hearing that or if Alexis is messing with his mind. Even if he was imagining it, that doesn't mean he wants the boy, it simply means he knows how obsessed Alexis is with him and it's making him paranoid. "I really should change rooms…" He mumbles, leaning back against his wall.

After an hour or so of finishing homework and just wasting time in his dorm, Johan decides to go out and see if he can't find someone to hang out with. Every time Alexis goes to tutor whoever that boy is it seems to take at least two hours. Once Johan asked why it took so long and Alexis simply said 'he's just that lost'. It was actually a fairly nice way for Alexis to put something, since Johan was expecting him to call the boy stupid.

Shaking the thoughts off, he gets up and heads out for a walk around campus. It's something he hasn't done on his own, or with anyone else really, so maybe he'll find some interesting stuff. Their campus is huge after all. Walking around he stares at the Victorian buildings, thinking of a few weeks ago when Alexis told him they were his favorite part of the campus aside from Johan himself.

In fact, looking around, all he can see are things that remind him of Alexis. It drives him crazy, having the boy on his mind all the time. Okay, so maybe possibly there is a small attraction there. Only because he reminds him of a girl though! He would definitely never be able to do anything with him if the illusion couldn't be held. Like, if they were naked. Not that they would be naked together. No, god no.

"Johan, your eye is twitching." An all too familiar voice calls from behind him. "What are you thinking that is so disturbing?"

"N-none of your business!" Johan exclaims and Alexis walks up to stand next to him, books in hand and glasses perched on his nose.

"Hm…I don't believe you. I think it is definitely my business." Alexis says and Johan blushes.

"What makes you think that?" Johan yells.

"It's always about me when it comes to you." Alexis teases, his blank expression still there.

"No it's not!"

"Yes, yes it is."

Johan looks away embarrassed. "Whatever. Just ignore it."

"If you say so…" Alexis says, walking ahead of him and singing. "I feel you, Johan..."

"C-CUT THAT OUT!" Johan yells and Alexis ignores him, singing louder every time.

"Even now I'm at your window. I am in the dark beside you, Johan!" Alexis sings, making Johan's face heat up more.

"D-damnit! Alexis!" Johan whines. He should have never brought it up this morning! Even if Alexis does sing it really well…

Alexis looks at him curiously. "Hm? Not loud enough?" He asks before smirking a little. "Or would you prefer I only sing it to you in our bedroom?"

Johan stares at him in shock. "WH-WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?"

"You know what I'm saying." Alexis says, his normal expression quickly returning.

Johan groans and looks over to Alexis, noticing the books in his hands slipping. "…You need help with those?"

Alexis looks at him confused for a second before shaking his head. "I'm fine."

"So…um…when did you start wearing glasses?" Johan asks awkwardly, trying to change the subject.

"I wear it when I tutor, it makes me seem smarter." Alexis says, moving his finger through the eye hole. "All appearances are art."

Johan sighs. "You would think that, wouldn't you?"

"It does make me look smarter though, doesn't it?" He asks, looking up at Johan.

"Y-yeah…" Johan says awkwardly, surprised at how cute Alexis looks in them. Like an innocent librarian. A librarian who would… "AAHHHHH!"

Alexis backs away surprised as Johan screams. "You…okay…?"

"Damnit! Stupid brain!" Johan hisses, grabbing Alexis' books to slam against his head.

"…What are you, five? Don't hit your head on something." Alexis says, reaching over and placing his hand on the book to cushion his head the next time.

"D-don't do that!" Johan whines, blushing.

"You're getting red an awful lot recently…" Alexis mumbles. "Thinking dirty thought?" He asks and Johan pales.

"I-! Um-! There's-! N-no!" Johan lies, making Alexis chuckle a little under his breath.

"If you say so."

"I-! I do say so!"

Alexis rolls his eyes. "Uhuh. So, want to go back to our dorm? I'm getting hungry and they are having a deal at the pizza place that delivers here."

Johan's eyes light up. "No way! They are?" He asks excitedly and Alexis nods. "That's awesome!"

"I figured you'd like that…since it's your favorite place." Alexis says, walking ahead of him to the dorm room.

"You…really know everything about me, don't you?" Johan mumbles to himself.

"You're talking to yourself again." Alexis calls from ahead.

"Mind your own business!"

They return to their room and Alexis calls the pizza place before sitting down on his bed.

"So, another movie night?" Alexis asks and Johan shrugs.

"Why not? What movies do you wanna watch?"

"Horror."

Johan looks at him surprised. "Really? Horror?"

"Yes. Horror is the best." Alexis says and Johan pales.

"I-I don't do well with horror movies…"

"You'll be fine. You can sleep in my bed if you get scared."

Johan twitches. "That was your plan this whole time, wasn't it?"

"I don't know what you mean. Now sit down with me and watch some movies." Alexis orders, leaning forward on his bed to pop a horror movie in.

"…Fine. But I'm only sitting with you because this is the best way to see the screen."

"Or because you are scared." Alexis says dully and Johan glares.

"No I'm not!"

"So it's because you want to cuddle? Alright then." The blonde teases, opening his arms and making Johan go bright red.

"Damnit shut up!"

* * *

A/N: Wooo! FINALLY GOT THIS DONE! I'VE BEEN WORKING ON IT FOREVER! It's been delayed because, well, I found a baby bird the other day and have been taking care of it. Feeding it every 30 minutes from 5 am to 9 pm. IT IS PAINFUL. Anyways...yeah...things will probably take longer until it leaves.


	5. Chapter 5

**This is Not Art**

_**Chapter Five: One step forward**_

* * *

The movie has been on for a good twenty minutes now, the pizza is all gone, and already Johan is squeezing the hell out of Alexis' hand. Sure, his hand hurts like hell, but it will go away soon. Besides, it's worth it to see Johan leaning on him when scared. It suddenly makes sense to him why men insist on bringing women to scary things.

"Oh look…she's putting her hands in the garbage disposal…who knew they were around so long ago?" Alexis mumbles as the woman's hands are devoured by the electric device and Johan tenses up.

"H-how are you so calm about that? THIS IS INSANE! HOW COULD SHE SO CASUALLY DO THAT?" Johan yells and Alexis looks at him curiously.

"Huh? What do you mean? She's crazy, it's only natural." Alexis answers and Johan twitches.

"You worry me." Johan says, making Alexis smile.

"You're cute." He replies, ignoring the statement. As the insane woman comes closer to the screen, the TV suddenly goes out and the lights die.

"AHH!" Johan yells, clinging to Alexis tightly.

"Huh…it's not storming…I wonder why the power went out…" Alexis says and Johan twitches.

"Maybe the crazy woman from the movie has taken over our school and is going to kill us…" Johan mumbles and Alexis shrugs.

"Maybe." Alexis says before wrapping his arms around Johan's shoulders. "But if she does, I'll keep you safe."

Johan stares at him surprised for a minute. He can feel the boy's breath on his shoulder, his soft skin on his neck. Even though they are in the dark and he's scared out of his mind, these small details are helping him to calm down a little. Looking down in the darkness he can see the boy as plain as day thanks to the moon coming through the window. That pale skin, untouched, waiting for him. "Alexis…"

"Hm?"

"I think I...want to try something…"

Alexis looks at him curiously. "Oh yeah? What would that be?" He asks as Johan remains silent, lowering his head to place a kiss on Alexis' forehead.

Johan quickly pulls away and looks down at the now bright red Alexis nervously. "U-um…I suppose…things like that aren't much different with you being a boy…"

Alexis looks at him confused. "Hm? Do you plan on doing that more often?" He asks, pulling Johan closer.

"I-I...um…I don't know. I've just…been wondering what it would feel like if I..." Johan looks away awkwardly, the feel of Alexis' body closer making him increasingly nervous. "I'm just curious."

Alexis moves to position himself so he's straddling Johan's legs, making sure to hover over them and not touch. "Then try what you want, Johan."

Johan tenses up at the new position, the dangerously intimate position. "A-Alexis…I'm not sure…I want to do much else."

Alexis nods, sitting down on Johan's lap. "I understand. If you don't think you can do it, you don't have to." He says in an almost challenging way.

"I-I could if I wanted to! I simply don't want to right now!" Johan huffs before allowing his arms to relax around Alexis' waist.. "Isn't this good enough…?"

Alexis looks at him surprised. "Yeah…this is good enough. I'll take the inch and not reach for the mile." He says before the lights suddenly come back on, along with the movie.

"AH! Sh-she's gone! She disappeared!" Johan exclaims, trying to keep his attention on the movie rather than their new position. Although it's scaring the hell out of him, it's easier to deal with than the possibility he might be falling for Alexis despite his gender.

"It's a new scene, Johan." Alexis points out blankly, moving on Johan's lap so he's facing the TV rather than the man himself. "She'll be back, don't worry." He teases and Johan pales.

"D-don't say that! Brat!"

"Well it's true, she's the main villain…one would assume. A woman who kills her children sure isn't the hero of the story." The smaller boy says, pressing his back against Johan's. "Right?"

"G-good point…" Johan stutters, his heart now beating in his chest, in fact he's pretty sure Alexis can feel it from how close he is. Thankfully he isn't saying anything. The rest of the movie passes with a few more screams from Johan, him quickly becoming thankful that Alexis is in his lap so he has something he can easily hug. Of course every time he did so he would notice a small smile on Alexis' face.

When it finally ends, the five disk DVD player goes to the next movie, a historical movie that Alexis picked out. Johan doesn't mind really, historical movies are interesting. Not to mention it's about a woman named Erzebet Bathory, a woman he has never heard of, so it has his interest. Before it starts he moves the two of them so he's up against the wall, giving his back a break from sitting up straight with no support. Alexis quickly settles back into his lap, letting out a sound of satisfaction as he does so.

It seems almost natural, having Alexis sit in his lap like this. The warmth coming from his back, his soft and pale hands occasionally fiddling with Johan's own around Alexis' stomach, and the smell of the smaller boy's hair wafting up to his nose. It's comfortable, warm, and truly just feels right. Perhaps he does love Alexis, but in a nonsexual way.

"So you've never heard of Erzebet, hm?" Alexis asks and Johan shakes his head. "Well, you're in for a treat." The boy says in an almost evil way.

"Alexis, you're creeping me out." Johan says and Alexis shrugs.

"You'll be fine." He assures him.

Johan soon realizes that Alexis is an evil, evil little boy. Granted the movie is truly a historical movie, the little brat left out the fact that this woman was a crazy bitch! First came her cutting her chest with a knife to place a lock of hair in it and sew it back up, then came her killing young girls for their blood. Seriously, who would have thought such a cute boy could be into such twisted shows?

"You're a brat." He says when it's finished and Alexis turns off the TV with the remote.

"It's not my fault she did that." Alexis replies. "Although it's probably a good thing the movies are over, you have been squeezing me so tightly I thought I was gonna puke."

Johan blushes. "I-! I-! Shut up!"

"You're comebacks are so hurtful, Johan." Alexis teases before shifting himself to face Johan.

"Wh-what are you doing?" Johan asks and Alexis backs away a little.

"Um…nothing. We have to meet with everyone pretty early tomorrow, so we should go to bed now." Alexis offers awkwardly as he begins to back up off of Johan's lap.

"Wait." Johan says, making Alexis immediately stop. "Where are you going?" He asks and Alexis looks at him confused.

"I am moving so you can go to your bed, of course." Alexis answers and Johan blushes.

"I-I thought you said I could sleep here." He says awkwardly and Alexis smiles.

"Yes, of course. Don't you want to get changed or anything?"

"No." Johan says. "I usually only sleep in my boxers, so this is fine. Do you need to get changed?"

Alexis looks up at him blankly for a minute before climbing back into his lap. "No, I'm good."

"A-alright." Johan mumbles awkwardly, wrapping his arms around Alexis' waist.

"I'm not a fan of looking a gift horse in the mouth…but you're acting really weird tonight…why the sudden change…?" Alexis asks and Johan looks away.

"I told you, I'm just curious…I don't know why I decided to today..." He says and Alexis nods.

"Alright then. I can settle for that. So let me go so I can lay down." Alexis orders and Johan let's go, following him under the covers before wrapping his arms around the boy's waist.

"Um…good night, Alexis."

"Good night, Johan."

Johan turns out the light and everything falls silent. He watches Alexis drift into sleep rather fast, faster than he thought he would. Staring at the boy he notices how peaceful Alexis is when asleep, and how beautiful he really is. His long eyelashes, beautiful hair perfectly disheveled, and his lips slightly parted. It's tempting, almost. Even knowing that Alexis is a boy, even unable to think about anything but his gender, Johan is starting to wonder what it would be like to kiss him. Really kiss him.

He leans forward, his lips inches from Alexis'. The boy moves a little in his sleep, making Johan quickly jump back and turn away from him, shocked at his own actions. He almost kissed Alexis. A sleeping Alexis. He almost took advantage of his fiancé-er-Alexis. "Oh god this is bad…" Johan mumbles under his breath.

* * *

A/N:Here's another chapter. Yes, those are both actual movies. The first one is Dark House, the second one is The Countess. Dark House is hilarious (although it isn't intended to be) and The Countess is interesting, although it isn't completely factual.


	6. Chapter 6

**This Is Not Art**

_**Chapter Six: Shut Up**_

* * *

It has been a few days since Johan and Alexis shared a bed, and since then Johan has been far too embarrassed to even look at Alexis. This was fine at first, Alexis was willing to wait for him to get over the embarrassment, but now it's just annoying.

"Hey, Johan." Alexis calls as he enters the room from the shower, his towel dangling from his waist.

"AH!" Johan yells, covering his eyes and going bright red. "P-put some damn clothes on!"

"That's the thing…I can't find any clean stuff. I refuse to put on dirty clothes, either. Wreaking is not art." Alexis says stubbornly.

"Th-then take some of mine!" Johan stutters. "Just throw something on for Christ sakes! Even just boxers!"

Alexis looks at him confused. "You want me to wear your boxers?"

"I don't WANT you to! But I want you in some clothes!"

"They're big." Alexis says and Johan opens his eyes, looking over to see his boxers sliding down the smaller boy's waist.

"Th-they have the ties in them…" Johan mumbles. "Tighten them up."

Alexis shrugs and does as he's told before grabbing a shirt and some pants, both of which are too big. "This is annoying."

"D-don't you have a class?" Johan asks, uncomfortable with him still being in the room

"No." Alexis says annoyed. "Don't you have some balls to grow?"

"Hey! Don't be a brat!" Johan yells and Alexis walks up to him on his bed.

"I'm not being a brat, you are." Alexis points out as he crawls onto the bed, making Johan back up to the wall. "You're acting like we had sex. All we did was sleep, and you kissed me, but it wasn't even on the lips." He says and moves closer to Johan, bringing their lips near one another. "You have two choices. Kiss me, or go on a date with me."

Johan goes bright red. "N-no way! Those are unfair choices!"

"Don't whine." Alexis says, sitting in his lap. "Make your choice or I'll make it for you." He threatens before leaning forward. "I can ravage you."

"You're a little pervert!" Johan hisses. "Behind that cute face is a horrible little letch!"

The smaller teen looks at him confused. "Well…of course I am, when it comes to you. I love you."

Johan goes bright red. "Don't say that on my lap! Fine! Let's go on a date!"

Alexis smiles a little. "Thank you. So where do you want to go?"

"Oh, I'm actually getting a choice on something?"

"I figured I'd throw you a bone."

"You could throw me a bone by not making me go." Johan huffs and Alexis looks at him annoyed.

"Coward. Why won't you just love me?"

"I do love-!" Johan stops himself, paling a little as they look at each other in shock.

"…You what…?" Alexis asks and Johan pushes him off.

"I-I'll meet you tomorrow at four to see a play at the opera house." Johan says quickly. "Wear something nice." He adds before running out of the room.

"Ah…an opera house…? How refined…" Alexis mumbles to himself before a small smile comes to his face. "He said 'love'…he ran away after…but he said 'love'." He says to himself before doing homework for a few hours, until Johan returns.

"OKAY! LET'S TRY THIS AGAIN!" Johan yells, re-entering the room. "I'm okay." He says, coming in. "W-we can talk."

"You said love." Alexis says and Johan tenses up.

"Don't TALK about that! I'm here to talk about th-the date." Johan says awkwardly.

"Alright, I'll behave." Alexis says before Johan lays out the plans. The opera will be at five and after that they will be going to a restaurant. It is apparently one of the dates Johan had planned out in the first semester before Alexis came. "I never thought it would be so extravagant…" He mumbles and Johan blushes.

"I-I just…a normal dinner at a fast food place and a normal movie would be no different from any other weekend…s-so…I figured we could…go all out…or something…" Johan explains awkwardly and Alexis smiles.

"It makes sense. I look forward to it." Alexis says and Johan nods shyly.

Both boys go their separate ways for the day, hanging out with others until four when they return to get dressed and leave. Both get dressed up in nice button up shirts and do their hair. As usual, Alexis goes to put his in the normal two braids, but is stopped by Johan.

"U-um…you always put it in two…why don't you try one…?" Johan offers and Alexis shrugs.

"Alright…if it's for you." Alexis says, tying it all back in one braid before grabbing his wallet and placing it in a hidden pocket inside his coat.

Johan looks to him nervously. "W-well…let's go then." He stutters out, leading Alexis off campus and to a taxi. They arrive to see 'The Marriage of Figaro' and sit up in a balcony seat, much to Alexis' surprise, but opts to say nothing. "You…know Italian, right? Because I'm pretty sure in some of those letters you mentioned knowing Italian."

Alexis nods. "Yes, that's right. I know Italian pretty well, since my father is good friends with an Italian family. Well, with Marcello's to be specific." He says before the music begins to play.

"W-wait! What?" Johan gasps and Alexis brings a finger to his lips, whispering 'shh'.

They get comfortable in their seat and the play begins with the main character, the servant Figaro, measuring the space for him and his fiancé's future bed as she tries on her wedding bonnet in a mirror. The two sit there, both intently watching until Johan feels a warm hand slide onto his. There's no movement to hold it, or anything of the sort, it's simply placed on top of his with every chance to pull away. He doesn't though, he really likes it. Honestly, Johan likes all of this. Going on a nice date with someone he cares about.

Okay, he might love Alexis again, but he can't tell the boy that. He's not even sure how far he can go with him knowing that he's a boy. This is why, he has decided, it's best not to say it out loud until he's sure he can give Alexis what he wants. Although he almost blurted it out earlier. In the meantime however, Johan decides he can at least hold his hand.

Alexis goes bright red as he feels Johan's hand turn and awkwardly cup his own. He smiles a little and makes sure not to do anything that might scare him away. This all seems perfect; the choice of date, the company, the subtlety of Johan's act. Sadly the play is over soon, too soon, and they head out.

"So where are we-?" Alexis gets cut off by Johan looking at him annoyed.

"You never said you knew Marcello's family!"

"It never came up." The boy says dully and Johan tenses up.

"Then you should have brought it up! You two are childhood friends?"

"I really don't get why this bums you."

Johan huffs. "Well you…you spent your childhood with a hopeless flirt who is good looking."

Alexis smiles. "Jealous?"

"Of course not!"

"It sounds like it."

Johan sighs in defeat. "I just…don't see why you never brought it up when we all met up at the club…or when you went to stay with him that one night because I had to stay up late for homework!"

Alexis sighs. "Peter was right there, idiot. Besides, I am in love with you and Marcello is in love with Peter."

Johan looks at him and groans. "Right, right…there's no reason to be…annoyed. It was stupid."

Alexis smiles a little and takes his hand. "I'm glad you were. It means you care in some way, right? It's a step in the right direction."

"Yeah…urm…let's go to the restaurant." Johan says awkwardly, leading him down the road.

"How are you getting the money for all this…?" Alexis finally asks and Johan pauses.

"None of your business."

"It is my business."

"I...I have had it since I got here for dates…when you came…" Johan mumbles.

"You have very classy taste. I'm impressed." Alexis says and Johan blushes, looking away.

"A-as if I care."

"Well, seeing as how you love me and are jealous of other people, I would assume my opinion matters." He teases.

"Shut up." Johan groans.

"Well, you were the one who said, and I quote 'I do love…' to me." Alexis smiles at him. "Right?"

"Seriously, shut up." Johan warns.

"And then of course-" Alexis begins before he is cut off by a hand clasping over his mouth.

"Alexis. I don't wanna talk about it." Johan says firmly, holding Alexis' shoulder with the other hand. The two are standing close now, and all Johan can feel is the soft pair of lips on his palm. Neither move, both just looking at one another for a few seconds. As he looks at Alexis, Johan doesn't realize a very important fact; he's moving closer to the boy. Alexis stands still, watching Johan slowly move in closer and move his hand from the boy's lips to cup his face.

He wavers a little, his lips an inch apart from Alexis', but soon swallows his nerves and closes the gap with a kiss.

* * *

A/N: Amazing all the things you learn on the first date! He couldn't even wait til after dinner for the kiss. XD Ugh, this took so long...UUGGHHHH. Oh well. (I really wanna see that play. REALLY. WANT. TO.)


	7. Chapter 7

**This Is Not Art!**

_**Chapter Seven: Acceptance**_

* * *

Johan pulls away from the kiss and looks down to Alexis' surprised expression. "U-um…sorry about that…"

"Do it again." Alexis says, moving closer. "Kiss me again."

A deep shade of red tints Johan's cheeks as he moves back. "M-maybe…wh-when we're alone…" He stutters out before taking his hand. "Let's go eat now."

"I love you." Alexis whispers, receiving no awkward responses from Johan, or even a scolding, just a light squeeze of his hand.

"Come on." Johan mumbles, walking faster now to the restaurant.

"Someone's anxious." The smaller teen teases before catching a glimpse of Johan's flustered expression and deciding to keep quiet. They go the rest of the way in a tense silence, only broken when they arrive and speak to the waiter.

"Th-this place is even nicer than I thought…" Johan mumbles, staring at the restaurant menu intensely in an attempt to ignore the fireplace, candles, and roses at the table.

"It's very romantic." Alexis muses as he watches Johan out of the corner of his eye. "More so than our dorm room."

"Y-yeah…" Johan says nervously before the two fall into another silence. It's not that they don't have anything to talk about, it's just Johan is still shocked at his own actions. Not to mention the fact he really wants to do it again. Honestly, he's sort of wishing they were in their bedroom right now so he wouldn't be too embarrassed to kiss him again.

"There's too much silence. Silence is not art." Alexis points out, bored of the quiet atmosphere. "You don't have to do it again if you don't want to."

"I-if I didn't want to…I wouldn't have…in the first place…" Johan mumbles, staring down at the table.

"I see. Johan…I think the girl from Wy is going out with that boy from Northern Cyprus." Alexis says blankly and Johan looks at him confused.

"H-huh…?"

"Yes, I think the way they have been acting with one another is very flirtatious, and the other day Marcello told me they were going out alone. This means it is a date, which means they are going out."

Johan laughs awkwardly. "One date doesn't mean two people are going out." He says, watching a disappointment sink into Alexis' eyes.

"So does this mean we are not going out?" Alexis asks and Johan blushes.

"W-well…no…we…are…"

"Why are we different?"

"Because…we…are…" The words are on the tip of Johan's tongue, 'Because we are in love', but they won't come out. Why is that so hard to explain? To say he loves Alexis. That four letter word is far more difficult than Johan could ever have imagined. He said them all the time when he thought Alexis was a girl, yet now…

"Engaged?" Alexis asks and Johan goes bright red.

"U-um…yeah…" He whispers, surprising Alexis.

"…I...see…" This time Alexis goes completely silent.

The rest of dinner is pretty straight forward; they eat and awkwardly fall into silences when something embarrassing is brought up. Soon the dinner is done and they are heading back to the dorm, a strange sort of tension hanging in the air as they both wonder what is next. Walking beside one another Johan glances to their hands, wondering if he should move to hold Alexis'. He then glances to his lips, wondering if maybe he should try to kiss him again…

"Would you hold my hand?" Alexis asks, breaking the silence and causing Johan to jump a little.

"Y-yeah. Of course." Johan says awkwardly as he reaches over and takes the boy's hand. It's warm, too warm. The contact makes Johan's heart race, bringing the memory of Alexis' warm lips back to mind. All he can think of is another kiss. A kiss where they are in their room and he doesn't do it out of frustration. "We need to hurry inside." He mumbles, receiving a curious look from Alexis.

"Well, it's not that far…"

"L-let's just…hurry up."

Alexis smirks a little. "Wanna get me alone?"

"That's not-!" Johan begins, falling silent when he looks over to Alexis.

"O-oh…" Alexis begins, taken aback. "You really do…" A determined look comes to his face and he practically drags Johan home to their dorm.

"I...I never…knew you were…so fast…" Johan says between gasps of air when they stop in front of their dorm building.

"I don't like to run. Running is not art." Alexis replies, looking to Johan. "You should run more."

"Sh…shut up!"

"Hard to take an order from you when you are practically on your knees panting."

Johan glares up at the boy, staying silent to catch his breath.

"So, since you were in such a hurry…" Alexis begins, looking to Johan as the man's breathing becomes normal again. "What exactly do you have planned?"

Johan blushes and looks to Alexis. "D-don't play naïve, Alexis."

"As you wish, Johan." Alexis smirks. "Then I look forward to when we get into the dorm."

"Pervert." Johan grumbles, taking Alexis' hand again and leading him inside, growing more and more nervous. They reach the dorm room, Johan fumbling with the doorknob for a moment before getting it open and letting Alexis in first.

"Johan-" Alexis begins, Johan interrupting him by pressing him against the door and kissing him. It's awkward, honestly; with teeth clashing, lips being bit accidentally, and noses bumping. Neither of them care about that though, both are too focused on going after the contact they have desired for so long. After a few seconds of awkward fumbling around they finally get a rhythm going. Johan has taken the lead in kissing, although neither really know what exactly to do with that- at least there are no teeth involved this time.

As the kiss continues, Alexis feels something warm against his stomach. He doesn't have long to wonder what it is though as it begins to slide under his shirt, revealing itself to be Johan's shaky hand. Johan's fingers hesitantly begin to slide up his bare stomach and to his chest, running over the boy's nipples to elicit a moan.

"Johan…" Alexis begins, placing his hands on Johan's shoulders. "W-we should…stop…" He mumbles, fully aware of just where this is going to go if he lets it. The idea of sex isn't bad, but he's not ready and he knows Johan is definitely nowhere near ready.

Johan looks at him through hazy eyes and nods. "R-right…" He back away slowly, the confidence he had when against Alexis no fading to be replaced by complete embarrassment. "Sorry…um…"

Alexis gently smiles at Johan and takes his hand. "You have finally kissed me, I see nothing to be sorry about."

Johan blushes more, looking away. "Y-yeah…um-"

"Johan! Alexis!" Peter yells as he opens the door, narrowly missing Alexis thanks to Johan pulling the boy against him. "…Um…am I interrupting something?" The blonde asks and Johan glares.

"You know damn well you are! I told you we were going on a date!" Johan fumes, going to kick the door closed.

"Whoa! Whoa! Calm down! I assumed you were done with the date since you're home!" Peter explains, looking the two of them over. "And you don't seem to have started any other activities…so…I figured you would be up for the club's movie night!" He says happily and Johan twitches.

"Since when does our club have a movie night?"

"Since I found a movie I wanted to show everyone!"

Alexis shrugs. "I see no reason we can't."

Johan looks the Alexis annoyed. "You don't?"

"The date is done, all we would do is sit around the room. We should see our friends." Alexis answers, looking to Peter. "Where are we watching it?"

"Well…um…we were gonna sneak into the club room." Peter says awkwardly.

"That's illegal!" Johan yells, before noticing a strange gleam in Alexis' eyes.

"Breaking and entering is art." Alexis says in a strange voice that leaves both Peter and Johan in a shocked silence for a few moments, only Peter able to find his voice.

"Your boyfriend is kind of creeping me out, Johan."

Johan doesn't say anything, he simply continues to look at Alexis in awe. Yes, what he said was random and strange, but that's Alexis. What really has Johan awed is the word Peter used; boyfriend. Alexis is actually his boyfriend, the one thing he didn't want when they first met up at the beginning of the semester is now the only thing he can think about.

Finally finding his voice, Johan smiles a little and tightens his grip on Alexis' shoulders. "Yeah, my boyfriend is strange." He says, watching a blush rise to Alexis' cheeks, making his own smile widen. "Well, let's go commit a felony, I suppose."

"That's the spirit!" Peter cheers, leading the two of them out.

On their way out, Johan grabs Alexis' hand and pulls him back for a moment. There's something he has to say. Something he _needs_ to say before he looses his nerve. He was planning on taking his time to say it tonight, but he definitely doesn't want to say it in front of a group of people. Not the first time at least. Of course saying it with Peter down the hall waiting for them wasn't exactly the most romantic thing either, but it will have to do. "Alexis..." He leans forward to whisper in Alexis' ear, receiving a curious look from the boy. "I love you."

A deep blush comes to Alexis' face, along with a bright smile aimed at Johan. "It's about time." He says before pulling Johan into a kiss.

"Hey! Are you two coming or not? If you don't move it I'm gonna tell everyone you decided to ditch us to have se-!" Peter's tease gets cut off.

"We're coming you lying little bastard!" Johan hisses, leading Alexis out to follow Peter.

They have a long way to go before Johan is completely comfortable with the idea of being with a man, but he can at least admit it to those he is closest to. Neither of them have any illusions that to the rest of the world, Johan will keep it secret as long as he feels the need to, but it doesn't matter. Secrets can be art, too.

* * *

A/N: This wasn't GONNA be the last chapter...but when I got done I was like 'wow, this seems like an ending. I'll take it.' The 'I love you' was a bit underplayed...but...they both _know_ he does, it was just a matter of him saying it. Also, it's obviously no longer M. If anyone wants some sort of epilogue or anything _with_ M, I will do it...but otherwise...I think this is okay. Probably.


End file.
